How do you handle a friend who thinks she knows everything about pregnancy just because she had a ba

answerer Asked: How do you handle a friend who thinks she knows everything about pregnancy just because she had a ba

So this is my first pregnancy.. there are some things that are new to me and if I am unsure I will ask my friend. However, my friend will just volunteer her information when it isn't even asked! It is SOO annoying!

For example the other day she asked me how my day was and I said it was fine and the pregnancy was going well but that I was having constipation. Before I could even say more, my friend interrupted me and was like "Oh, well what you have to do is take Colace and then do this and then do that, blah blah" and then I told her "yes, i know. I am already doing that. I am aware of what you have to do when you have hemorrhoids and constipation." And when I told her I was excited for my prenatal appointment she told me I don't even have to go to my 1st appointment because she could probably do it for me since she is a self proclaimed "expert" on pregnancy.

I understand she might have good intentions but she is coming across as a know-it-all and just telling me how to do everything when I am not even asking for advice!! The kicker is that she only recently had her first child. She never read any pregnancy books and doesn't even take pregnancy seriously!! Her mom does everything for her and she just mooches off of her parents. She hardly spends time with her kid!!

The most annoying part is that when I told her I am going to breastfeed she told me: "Um, Oh. Well, listen honey… Not to be rude but your boobs are small now.. just wait till your breastfeed, they are going to get even smaller." like WHO the hell would say that>?! She is only knocking the idea of breastfeeding because SHE didn't do it.

She recommended that I see her OB/GYN and when I decided to go to a more reputable hospital/OB GYN in the area she started saying how her doctor was better.

I just can't stand it anymore!!! UGH!! She isn't married and doesnt have a whole lot going for her right now so the only thing I can imagine is that it makes her feel better when she talks to me so condescendingly…

Oh, and apparently now my friend is psychic too because she said she knows I am going to go late. She bases this off the fact that SHE was late. argh!! Its driving me nuts, all of her comments!

How would you deal with this?? What do I say to her? I am hormonal right now so I am afraid I am going to just lose it one day! lol. I normally have learned that I should NOT ask her for advice, but now it is annoying because she just gives advice whenever she sees fit…


Check Your Bewbies Answered:
My sister is EXACTLY like this. and bad part is…I freaked out on her and almost lost my relationship with her! she just put her opinion where it wasnt needed all the time and i wanted to shoot her in the face! she was very rude about it too not even trying to be nice. like she called me selfish for wanting to have my baby in a hospital only because she was having hers at a birthing center! LIKE WHO SAYS THAT KIND OF STUFF?! well…all I do is just smile or nod and just say "Ok thanks but ill do it my way." or just "ok thanks for the input" and at first saying those things just pissed me off even more but after a while I got used to it and just made myself not even care. Soooo. Try to ignore it. I know itll be hard but if you wanna keep your friendship just smile and say ok. and walk away or just change the subject. itll pay off and in the end its your baby and you can do what you want for him/her. Good luck and congrats on the little one! 🙂

Neil Answered:
yes you are hormonal, perfectly normal.
just try to avoid her, it would probably be good for you to just stay away from her for a day or a few days.
it seems as if she is on your nerves and thats not healthy for you..
i, myself, would just tell her to STFU. haha

but its also normal for first time moms to include their experiences and try to help, i dont think she has bad intentions, i just think she is taking her intentions a little too far.

ignore her.

AShay Answered:
If there are times you ask this girl for advice then I think you're going to have to put up with her telling you things even when you haven't asked.She's assuming a role of your mentor as she has recently been through the experience herself.It doesn't sound like she has mean intent.She's just giving her advice … whether you want it or not.If it troubles you so much, don't go around her.Stay clear of her and she can't bug you.Keep in mind that when one is pregnant often there are emotions that one doesn't understand or have control over.

Just steer clear of this girl until you're feeling more sure of yourself.

Nonnie22 Answered:
Pregnancy is different from person to person and also from child to child. Any woman who has had multiple births will attest to this.

Midwives are specialist in their chosen field (you do get the odd nut job MW though so beware) and their advice should be followed if at least not listened to carefully. Many of them have had children themselves and can relate to what you are experiencing. They talk not only from what they learned during their training, but also from the many women they see come and go.

Breastfeeding is a no-brainer. In the end it is your personal choice. I think your friend is self centered though, sacrificing the benefits of breast feeding for the sake of vanity. Anybody that advises you against breast feeding (unless for a medical reason) shouldn't be giving advice. The benefits are many, one such benefit being that its helps the mother redistribute and lose much of the extra weight gained during pregnancy. Maybe have a look at her **** and if it's a wide load, suggest to her that it's maybe because she didn't breast feed.

You will find half the people you meet will have a shot at your due date and the sex of the baby (many basing their opinions on their own experiences), lol, get used to that.

One of the most important things during your pregnancy is that you have an open, honest, trusting and comfortable relationship with your midwives and OB/GYN. When you find a good MW at your antenatal clinic that you like, ask to be booked to see her again when you return, as they will be the ones you are likely to have the most contact with.

People that carry on like this are usually quite insecure and unsure of themselves and like to have someone else travel the same footsteps to vilify what they have done. Don't let her insecurities become your own. Just nod politely and tune out.

Best wishes to you and your baby.

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